[She makes a noise of uncertainty, laying her head in the crook of his shoulder and making circles on his shoulder with her thumb.
His thoughts run parallel to hers. It's not as surprising as it should be. She takes a while to think about it.]
...Probably not.
[She knows herself at least well enough to know she'd be just as bad about holding onto things, about not being able to forgive. Fray could attest to that. And yet... how miserable of a person could she have the capacity to become? It's hard to imagine, from her only twenty-odd summers of experience, compared to his twelve-odd millennia.]
But...
[She thinks of her mother. She thinks of how she never forgave her for taking out all of her problems on her children, how even though Irhya was hardly in the right, Shura was little better. Even Hades had said as much.]
Maybe it's possible not to forgive someone, and still love them. To not so much move on from the things that hurt you, but to acknowledge it's over with and that life goes on, even if you might wish it didn't sometimes.
[Just like Shiva had never really left Hraesvelgr's mind, after all that time apart. Even with the knowledge she was never to return, with all those centuries ahead of him.
Perhaps that's the very thing he can't quite accustom himself to just yet. Hate, misery, bitterness -- alongside care, as well. Not that it will ever be easy, but to some, that's just how things are; joy in small doses in a lifetime of alternating pain and apathy.]
I think that might be the conclusion I would draw after a while. Easier is not necessarily better. Rarely, in fact.
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His thoughts run parallel to hers. It's not as surprising as it should be. She takes a while to think about it.]
...Probably not.
[She knows herself at least well enough to know she'd be just as bad about holding onto things, about not being able to forgive. Fray could attest to that. And yet... how miserable of a person could she have the capacity to become? It's hard to imagine, from her only twenty-odd summers of experience, compared to his twelve-odd millennia.]
But...
[She thinks of her mother. She thinks of how she never forgave her for taking out all of her problems on her children, how even though Irhya was hardly in the right, Shura was little better. Even Hades had said as much.]
Maybe it's possible not to forgive someone, and still love them. To not so much move on from the things that hurt you, but to acknowledge it's over with and that life goes on, even if you might wish it didn't sometimes.
[Just like Shiva had never really left Hraesvelgr's mind, after all that time apart. Even with the knowledge she was never to return, with all those centuries ahead of him.
Perhaps that's the very thing he can't quite accustom himself to just yet. Hate, misery, bitterness -- alongside care, as well. Not that it will ever be easy, but to some, that's just how things are; joy in small doses in a lifetime of alternating pain and apathy.]
I think that might be the conclusion I would draw after a while. Easier is not necessarily better. Rarely, in fact.